Happy anniversary!
Where you been?
Where you been??
Probably interviewing for new secretaries . . .
What was her name?
Does she bend like I used to
in the back of that Lexus?
Remember that party?
The one where Jerry dressed up like Santa?
I'm only 10 lbs. heavier!
And I gave you two babies!
You're cruel to me!

Nice to see you're out of bed
1 p.m. that's a new record isn't it?
You're not eating again
I can tell
Look at your arms...look at your arms!

Like Iggy Pop!
Like Christ on the cross!
Madonna! Madonna! Madonna!
And my paternal grandmother!
Look at me when I'm talking to you!
Speaking of which...
When was the last time
you looked at me
like you want me?
Like you need me?
Like you believed in me?
Or made me a dinner?
Shut up!
Shut up!!

. . . Is she prettier than me?
Does she make you feel like a man?
It's you and your bottle and your Rolex . . .
Where's your dream home NOW, Ken? Huh?

Impossible!
You're just impossible!
And you never listened to me anyway!

Happy Anniversary!
Here's your dinner -- cold and rotting on the dining room table!

Get out!
You get the hell out!
If I ever speak to you again it'll be too soon!

Shut up!
Shut up!!